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Chapter 19
Cameron
Pain... fire all over... death... no... not lucky enough... pain... torture... voices... nnm... hot... very hot... cool... hot again. Who's crying? Me? Deep voice... two... someone will be sick... me? Burning.... Skin peeling... open air.... Stinging... pain... death, please.
Where am I? Sleep. Little pain. Brian? Who? Sleep, yes, sleep.
"Mmgumg."
"I think she's coming around."
Deep voice. Sleep. Ouch! Touched... deep pain.
"Mmp."
"Sorry."
Soft voice. Sweet voice. Who?
"Cameron can you hear me? It's Brian, Kevin's here too."
"Hi Camy."
A sound. Laugh? Not laugh. Fun sound. Pain... there.
"Ohhh, you gonna let him call you that?"
New voice. Young. Who's who?
"Mhmm."
"It's me, Nick. Remember? You saved my life you know? I'm gonna be in debt to you my whole life."
"Mmmmhmpm."
Sound again. Fun sound. Laughs.
"I know, sweetie, he's insensiteive. Like you want him taging along for the rest of your life."
Sweet voice. Nice word. Cameron? Sweetie? Me? Who?
"Hmm...uhhh."
Drink. Water. Yes, water.
"Wa...wat-"
"Here baby, right here."
Sweet voice: Brian's voice. Touched. Lifted. Water. Mmm.
Pain. Throat scratched from cough. More pain.
"It's ok, there's plenty of water, just take it slow."
"Br...Bri?"
"Yeah, baby, I'm right here."
Lowered. Not touched.
Fingers flinched. Lifted. Touched. Soft hands: soft voice: Brian's hand.
"Wh-"
Cough.
"What...I..."
"It's OK, don't push it."
"Sh...Shhhut... up."
Brian chuckled. "Sorry. What do you need?"
"Ssstory."
"You want a bed time story?"
Young voice: Nick.
"Sst."
Pause. Don't stuter.
"Stupid."
Pain.
Nick laughed. Deep voice: Kevin's. Kevin laughed. Brian laughed. Pain.
"What happened?"
Better. Less pain.
"You were in a bombing." Kevin said.
Too quick. Too fast. Liar.
"Nick's...house?"
"It's gone, but I was gonna move anyway."
Liar.
"Stop. Now."
"Stop what?" Brian asked.
"Lies."
"They're telling the truth, well Nick may be lying but you were in a bombing."
Kevin's lying for Brian. OK, liar Kevin.
"How bad... am I?"
"Pretty bad, but you heal like a super hero." Nick said. "Can I write about you?"
"Screw...that."
Open eyes. Come on. One-first. Open. Open. Ugh. Fine.
Laughing.
"Anyone home?"
New voice.
"In here." Brian called.
Pain. Ringing.
"Hmmshm."
"Sorry." Brian chuckled.
Rubbed forehead. Nice.
"Hey, what's with the yelling in the sick room?"
Scratchy voice. Nice point. Like this voice. No yelling. Scratchy voice gets A.
"She can hear us, tell her who you are." Brian said.
"She knows me."
"But I don't think she can remember."
More voices? Stumped. Who? New soft voice. Not like Brian. Different.
"It's AJ, Cameron. Remember? I made you be my girlfriend for a day."
Scratchy voice: AJ, get a C for stupid memory.
"Ghph."
"She say something yet?" AJ asked.
"Yeah, shut up and screw that." Kevin said.
Joke. Smile. Did I? Hurt. Pain.
"She smiled!"
New voice. Excited. Happy.
"Maybe she got some humor out of all this." Brian said.
Stupid joke. Forgiven. Why? Like Brian. Why? Love Brian? Yes. Don't tell. Why not?
"You remember me? Howie? I don't really have any good memories with you so I won't mention any."
"Say."
Voice cracked. Pain.
"Should I?"
Saw dim light. Pain. Too bright. Light gone.
"She's trying to open her eyes."
"I'm...not...dead yet."
"So?" Nick asked.
"Don't...mphn...talk like I'm...not here."
More bright light. Less pain. Still too bright.
"Too bright."
No touching. Lights dimmed fast. Touching.
"Better?"
"Hphet."
Fuzzy creatures.
"Good to open those eyes, huh?" AJ asked
"I can't...see."
Silence. Frightened people. Help them. Make them get it.
"I see...some."
Turned some right. Pain. Turned back. Pain. Turned some left. Pain. Turned back. Less pain.
"Kevin."
"Yeah?"
"Come here."
"What's up?" He crouched next to my bed.
"When I can...I'm going to hurt you."
"Why?" He asked, chuckling.
"My name...is Cameron, not Camy."
"Camy's good though." AJ said.
I stared at Kevin still. "Are you wearing, blue?"
"Yeah."
I sighed and turned my head back.
"My throat hurts."
"Your whole body hurts I imagine." Brian said.
I looked at him. "I can't see your eyes."
I could see the bright white from he teeth.
"You will though."
"Don't get sentimental." I looked back at the ceiling. "Did I loose anything?"
"No, can't you feel it?" Brian asked.
"I feel confused and pain of undesirable means. But that's it." I paused, my throat raw. "At least I can think more than one word a sentence."
"We're glad you're OK." Howie said.
"Where's Bruno?"
"The dog, she's worried about the dog." Brian's lips touched my temple. "He's been staking out the bedroom. "
"I heard some yappy thing earlier. Did I imagine it?"
"No." AJ laughed while Brian answered. "That's my dog."
"That's not a dog."
"Stop." He said then laughed. "Do insult my puppy."
"Yeah." I frowned, seeing small shapes of something on the fan. "Did you draw on your fan?"
"No, I had someone else though. Can you read it?"
"Yeah, a little." I sighed and closed my eyes.
"Do you remember how you got here?" Kevin asked.
"No." I said. "I'm tired."
"It's OK." He kissed my temple again, his hands squeezed mine, he let go. "Get some sleep, I'll let Bruno in to sleep by the bed."
"Brian?" I asked before he left.
"Yeah."
"How long will you be on tour?"
"For another couple months."
"Oh.
"Why?"
"Do you think you could find a break in there some where?"
"Probably, if I know what for."
"Stupid joke."
"Sorry, couldn't help it."
"I want you to meet someone important to me."
"Then defiantly. As soon as you get better, we'll find time to go."
"Thank you."
Sleep.
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