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Chapter 15
*Nina's POV*
The weeks after the incident passed quickly, and I grew so much closer to the guys, and of course Nick. One night I was over at Nick's and we were just talking, when he asked about Kris. He held my head in his lap, and I looked up into his concerned blue gaze.
"How is Kris? I haven't heard from her in a while," Nick commented.
"Nick, she's bad off. She won't eat anything and barely does anything but work and sleep. I'm scared, but I don't know what to do to help her. Kris is so thin now, and she's lost that sparkle that makes her so special. It's like someone ripped out her heart and soul and left nothing but a shell behind. She won't go out anymore, except at night and God only knows where she is then.." I sobbed as Nick pulled me close, just as scared as I was. *
*3rd Person*
Kris looked outside and saw the setting sun in a blaze of color, bright reds and light blues and violets. Pulling on a pair of baggy, black drawstring pants and a royal blue tank top, Kris grabbed her Adidas sandals, a small book bag and left the darkening apartment. *
20 minutes later, Kris pulled off to a side embankment next to a steep cliff, the waves crashing on the beach not far below. A gentle breeze fluffed her hair and caressed her cheek with fine grains of sand as she slowly walked down to the beach. The full moon shined down on the beach, illuminating it and making a fire unnecessary. As she stared out at the sparkling waves, Kris realized she was tearing herself apart, it was time to stop and heal herself. But it didn't include Brian, and that scared her. For the first time in a long time, Kris prayed.
"Dear Lord, please give me the strength to do this awful thing that I so fear, but need so desperately. It's gonna hurt, not only me but also many others. I know it will, but some things need to be done, and this is no exception, but I can do it, with Your help." When Kris opened her eyes, she felt happier and better than she had in a long time.
"Kris?"
Kris' confidence almost shattered at that sound, but she forced herself to stay calm.
"Brian, what's up?" she asked, knowing what he wanted to say. She hadn't talked to him for weeks, nor anyone else except Nina.
"Can we talk?"
"Shoot."
"Um, okay," Brian said, flustered by her forwardness. "Kris, I love you. When I left the hospital that day, I knew it. Actually, I'd known, but you hadn't wanted a relationship. When I saw Chris and you, well, that was pure jealousy that made me leave, and my pride that didn't let me stop in that door. I've been worried, no one has heard from you since, and so is everyone else. Kris, please don't be mad anymore, I'm not mad at you for what happened, I'm mad at myself. Please?" Kris looked at him, her heart in her hands.
"Brian, there was never a chance for me to explain! He caught me off guard, and you ran before I could explain what had happened." Brian's blue eyes started to glow with anger.
"How would you feel if you walked in on me and some other woman kissing, Kris? Wouldn't it hurt? Besides, that wasn't exactly a just friends kiss that I saw.." Kris glared at him and stood up, brushing sand off her pants.
"Thank you, father! Do you think I don't know what it feels like, to walk in on someone you care about so much it hurts, and see them with someone else? What the heck do you think I felt that first night I met you?" Brian realized his mistake and quickly tried to figure out what to do, when he looked up and saw Kris was already to the cliff, running with her sandals in her hand. He ran after her, his black button down flying behind him, as he yelled, "Kris, wait! Please!" She paused and looked back, tears streaming down her face. He approached her slowly, his blue eyes desperate, sad and full of his love for her.
"Kris, what are you so scared of? I don't understand why we can't be together if we love each other. Can you honestly look me in the eye and say you don't love me?" Brian asked, now standing next to her, his hands on her shoulders. Kris wiped away her tears and looked him straight in the eyes.
"I don't love you." Brian stared, shocked, as Kris ran up to her car, and drove off, tears Brian never saw streaming down her face as she said to the sky, "I love you baby, so much!" *
Brian woke up the next morning to a large hand shaking him and growled, "Stop it, I feel like I'm in the middle of a freaking earthquake!" A low voice rumbled, "Sleeping Beauty, time to wake up and see the camera flashes! We have a shoot and interview at three."
"So? Let me sleep some more," Brian mumbled, rolling over to look up at Kevin. His cousin silently appraised him and was shocked by his haggard appearance and sunken eyes.
"Brian, it's one o'clock! I tried to wake you at ten and you tried to sock me!" Kevin said, more than a little concerned.
"Oh
man, it's gonna be one hell of a day," Brian moaned, jumping out of bed
and heading for the shower. *
Brian was in a foul mood, and it showed. Nick greeted him at the shoot with
a perky, "Hey Frick, wassup? Man, you look like crap, you okay?" Brian
glared at him and muttered, "Go to h*ll," as he passed, leaving Nick
open mouthed. By the time they were supposed to take pics, everyone got as far
away as possible, and Brian didn't have the heart to smile for them. When they
were done, AJ approached him cautiously.
"Hey B-Rok, what's up with you? You are in one pissy mood and no one knows why." Brian sighed and slumped in a chair, then explained everything that had happened.
"Man,
call her, find out what's going on. I know she loves you, it was obvious to
everyone, and you know she loves you. Go after her man, go get her before she's
gone.." AJ advised, wondering what the heck was going through her head.
*
Brian decided to go talk to Kris, to not screw up this time and tell her how
he felt. He knew she didn't have to work, so he hopped in his Beemer and sped
towards her house. On the way, he passed a shop and got an idea. Brian pulled
over and ran into the shop, then came out just as quickly, a single but beautiful
red rose in his hand. He pulled down his bball cap more as some girls on the
other side of the street caught sight of him. He jumped back in his car and
drove off before they could figure out what to do.
"Sorry
girls, there's just something I need to do," Brian thought. He tried to
give fans whatever he could, they were what made his career possible, but there
were times.. *
Five minutes later, Brian pulled up in front of Kris' apartment. Taking a deep
breath, he grabbed the rose from the passenger seat and walked up to her door,
pausing before he knocked. No answer, not even a noise from within. He pulled
out a key Kris had given him and slipped it into the lock, then peered into
the dark apartment.
"Kris?
Kris, are you here?" Brian called, stepping in the empty apartment. He
stepped into her room, and saw an envelope laying in the center of her neatly
made bed, with his name on it. Brian's throat constricted and his hands shook
as he picked up the envelope, tore it open and read the letter written in Kris'
neat hand, which read:
"Dear Brian, I don't know where to begin, because this is the end. I'm leaving Orlando, and I don't know when I'll be back. I can't tell you why I'm doing this, because honestly, I'm not sure myself. It was too much of, well, everything. Christian, Josh, you, my job. Once things are back in order in my life, I'll be back, but I'm not asking you to wait for me, that would be crueler than what I am doing now. Baby, I'm sorry, so very sorry. Look to the future, it will be happier than what it is now. Anyway, I'm going and I'm so sorry, even though I know it just doesn't cut it. Tell the guys I'm sorry, and tell Na I'll still send her money for my half of the rent and that I'll miss you all, but I'll be back. I'm sorry babe. See ya, Kris."
Brian's eyes filled with tears that would not stop coming and he almost missed something scrawled at the bottom of the letter, hard to read because of the tears that had fallen there from Kris.
"P.S.-
I lied, I love you with all I have, and I've known since the first time you
told me, at the hospital. Good bye, K.T."
Brian started weeping, his head in his hands and his heart shattered into a thousand pieces.
"Kris, wherever you go, know that I'll always love you babe, and I'll never stop, even if I wanted to," Brian cried out loud, then started sobbing again. *
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