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Epilogue
7 Months Later
The Last Concert of the Tour
Brian's View
"Hello Orlando!" I yelled into the mic as I waved to the fans.
"How is everyone doing tonight?" I asked. Screams were going off everywhere.
"Glad to hear you all doing well," I smiled.
"Yup, we have a very large announcement to make!" Kevin said glancing over at me. All the guys walked over and nodded.
"A rather larger announcement...so could you all do us all a favor?" Howie asked. Screams still were going wild.
"Could you all settle down just for a few minutes? We would like to tell you all something and we would like everyone in the arena to hear. It's very important," AJ said. The screams then started to die down. It wasn't complete silence, but it was as quiet as it could get with nearly 40,000 girls all packed into an arena.
"Thank you," Nick said.
"Now...how do we start?" AJ said taking a seat on a stool that was set up for him. The rest of us took a seat also on a stool.
All the guys then glanced at me. I looked at them confused and they all motioned for me to continue. I shook my head and mouthed 'no.' They just looked at me and Kevin got up.
"Brian is going to tell you for us. He has a better way with words then we do...we didn't really prepare for this," Kevin said. I looked at him wide eyed. Why did I have to do it? Why me? I wasn't the right person to do it! Kevin or Howie would be way better! I don't know what to say!
I covered my mic and leaned over, "I can't tell them. There's no way."
"Well, sorry pal but you're gonna have to. We all agreed on it," AJ smiled at me while he patted my back. The audience was getting quieter and quieter. I then sighed and faced toward the audience. I got up and walked near the end of the stage. I looked out into the faces of the fans that we have had for years...people that have supported us the whole way through, the people that actually made the Backstreet Boys succeed, the people that stood in line to buy concert tickets and to buy our CDs, the people that each and every one of us love very dearly. What I was about to say to them was going to break their hearts...I didn't want to do it.
I cleared my throat and raised the mic to my mouth.
"What I am about to say might shock some of you...probably all of you. Some of you might have not seen this coming...others might have seen it coming for days, weeks, months or probably even years...but it's finally happening," I began. I stopped for a moment and looked at a few of the girls in the audience. Some had the look of pure confusion on their faces, some knew what was going on and just listened intently, but others...they were already beginning to cry. This was what I was afraid of.
"All of us have been thinking about this for a while now and we've been discussing it. We have finally come to the conclusion of taking a break...a rather large break," I said. I then heard girls scream out 'You're breaking up!?!?!' or 'They're breaking up!!!' Screams were going off everywhere.
"Now settle down," I said. "We aren't totally breaking up..."
The screams got quieter and girls were looking at me with pure confusion, most had tears streaming down their faces.
"We have decided that we are just going to take a break. A couple years, probably more. We all want to spend more time with our families. As you all know we have children and wives and we aren't being able to go on that many vacations or anything normal a regular family would do. We're missing out on a lot of things and we would like to do more with them and not miss out on as much," I explained. The fans were still crying. Others stayed strong and just stood there in shock. I guess they really didn't suspect it that much. We've been around forever.
"Please understand..." I began but then a hand touched my shoulder. I looked back and saw Tiffany looking at me frowning. The rest of the wives were coming up onto the stage.
"Oh...Hi honey," I said kissing her cheek. I then turned back to the crowd and said, "I'm sure you all know my wife Tiffany. The kids are in the back. I bet you know the rest of the wives also."
No screams were heard, no yelling. All you could really hear is light crying or small talking.
"Hi everybody," Tiffany said into the mic. Some "Hi"s came from the audience. Tiffany then looked at me and whispered, "Why didn't you tell me you were going to do this?"
I covered the mic and whispered back, "Because I knew you'd get upset and try to make me not do it. We all really want this to happen...we have families that we need to spend time with."
She nodded and slightly smiled. She then stepped back and went over to the other guys and wives. I turned back to the audience.
"Ya'll alright?" I asked making a funny face. Some laughs were heard and the girls crying smiled.
"That's better. We are all very sorry for doing this but it was bound to happen sometime right? At least it was later and you had the chance to hear more of our music and grow with us. We have written songs for you right? They were to show you how much we are thankful for each and every one of you but we can't even express how much all of you mean to us. You have been there always through everything and you have kept the Backstreet Pride Alive. We didn't want to break this news to you fearing how you would react. We hate to disappoint our fans, we always wanted to keep you guys happy. I guess we failed just now huh?"
Screams were going off screaming "No!"
I smiled and said, "I'm glad to hear that. We all want you to know that we'll be back...We promise with everything we have. If we don't, then you can come and beat us to death. No, I'm playing!"
Laughs and screams were now going off. They were all beginning to stop crying and listen to what exactly I had to say. I was happy my words were cheering them up a little bit. I knew that I wouldn't be able to stop their pain or all of their tears that were going to escape or already escaping but I wanted to let them know that we do care and we don't want them to hurt too much.
"Now that some of you are back to your normal selves, I'd like to go on. We all care for you and you'll always be in our hearts. We chose to announce this on our last concert of the tour because it'll be airing on MTV and on a few of your local stations around the country. We wanted to postpone this as much as we could so you all could enjoy your concerts but now the bomb has dropped and we are quite relieved to have it off our chests and having it out in the open. We want to give you guys something to show our appreciation..." I said and then looked back at the guys. Nick nodded and then ran off the stage.
"We're all gonna give you a little surprise. To not make many fans angry across the country we gave them these things at their concert also. We're just gonna give you something a little extra. Wanna know what that extra something is?" I asked. Nick then came back on stage and took his seat back on the stool.
Screams were going off widely around the arena.
"Before I tell you the little extra something, on your way out we'll be giving out free T-shirts for all of you. It's just a little treat from all of us to you," I smiled into the mic. Screams were heard all around.
"Now, this little something extra isn't an object or something you can take home...well you can take it home in your hearts and your mind but you can't take it physically home. This little something is a song, a song you probably all know by now. It's quite old. It's by Sarah Mclachlan. When we're singing...you see all those screens up there?" I asking pointing to a few of the screens that were above the stage. Screams went off as in "Yes."
"We're going to be showing clips of us and our concerts and how we have grown since we have began...that's gotta be a lot of footage don't ya think?" I smiled.
"All the footage won't be able to fit in on how long the song is going to be going so it'll only show a few minutes of it. If you want the whole copy or video tape they'll be being given out when the concert ends with the T-shirts. Yes, I said GIVEN out. They're all for free," I said. Screams were beginning to rise higher.
"For all of those who are watching this on TV, the tape will be sold in stores next week. We wanted to give them out for free to all of you also but that can't really happen when it's all over the U.S. Stores won't really allow it so we're sorry. It'll be cheap though," I smiled.
"Yes, I know I said that what we were going to give to you wasn't going to be an object. Even though we're giving you this tape it's not what we want you to focus everything you have on. We want ya to listen to us sing!" I lightly laughed.
"OK, I'm done babbling so just sit tight and we'll be back out in about...10 minutes. We gotta get ready," I said into the mic. I then walked off the stage with the rest of the guys.
Backstage people were running around wildly barking out orders. I changed quickly into a pair of khaki pants, a white wife beater, and a blue over shirt. The rest of the guys dressed the same way but with different colored over shirts. Nick had green, Howie had purple, Kevin had black, and AJ had yellow. I grabbed my mic and went over to Tiffany and the kids who were waiting to go on stage also. Our families were coming on stage with us. We wanted them with us through our last moments of our career...well I mean our last moments until we take a large break.
I started to get nervous and fiddled around with the mic in my hands. I pulled the curtain back slightly and looked out into the crowd. Fans were smiling and laughing, some were still sad but for the most part all were just like our normal fans...our fans that we have grown so attached to. I mean, without the fans we wouldn't be us. We wouldn't be the Backstreet Boys. I'm very grateful for each of our fans and I wish I could give each and every one of them a handshake, a hug, or a kiss on the cheek and tell them thank you for everything. They've done so much and they've kept the Backstreet Boys alive. They kept the Pride alive. I don't know what we all would have done without our fans. They mean a lot to us and we all love them very much. To me, we have the best fans there can ever be. It's just like our song "Larger Than Life" says...they are Larger Than Life.
"Daddy?" I heard a little voice say below me as someone tugged on my pant leg. I looked down and found Brian, Jr., holding onto my leg. I smiled and picked him up kissing his cheek.
"What we doing daddy?" He asked looking around curiously.
"We're waiting to go on stage. You and Mommy and everyone else are gonna be on stage with me and the rest of your uncles."
"Ohhhhhhh," he said. I smiled and kissed his cheek.
I then looked over at the rest of my kids. They're all my reason for living...as is Tiffany. I have a total of 6 kids and I love each and every one of them with all my heart. They're all a part of me and to think that I actually helped create them always makes me smile. All the fights, all the laughs, and all the problems are worth going through with them. They've been through a lot I can tell you that but what they have gone through hasn't changed anything about them. They're still my kids and always will be. I'm proud of them with everything they do and I support them on their decisions. Well, most of them anyway. I sometimes wish I could go through some moments again, like the bonding times I had with Christian or Jason. The nights Michelle and I sat in her room and we just talked about anything and everything. The long days I'd spend with Courtney playing dolls or coloring or playing house with her and now I have the chance to do the same things with Brian and Brianna. I won't miss their first day of school, Brianna's first dancing recital or Brian's first basket made in his first basketball game, they're first date, or their first girlfriend or boyfriend. I definitely won't miss their wedding. Now that the Backstreet Boys are taking a break, I won't miss anything. Not one thing and I'm very happy about that. I'm looking forward to doing normal fun things with them. I can't wait. Each one has something I love about them.
Michelle, she's my first born. I know I wasn't there when she was born, I actually wasn't there for 2 and half years of her life but she doesn't blame me for it. She's not angry about it either. She got upset when Tiffany and I told her for the first time but she's warmed up to it. Everything about her makes me smile. How she's always smiling or laughing. How she's always helping Tiffany or me out. How she always calls me, "Daddy." How she never gets embarrassed with me around. How she always hugs or kisses my cheek even with her friends around and how she always tells me she loves me. She's looking like her mother more and more each day and she's so beautiful. She's always going to be my little girl.
Christian is my first son. He always finds a way to shock me. Just about a month ago I found out he had a girlfriend. Tiffany, Michelle, and Jason have known for a couple months and NOW I find out. I'm not angry about it. If I actually heard of it sooner I probably would have ruined something. Tiffany and everyone else says he looks so much like me. I don't see it...to me he looks like Tiffany but in a masculine kind of way of course. He's getting mature too fast for me. He doesn't like me to be around him when his friends are over, he doesn't like me calling him "Buddy," but I do it anyway hee hee. He doesn't like me hugging him or being at all mushy with him like saying "I love you son" or "I love you buddy." It honestly gets frustrating but I understand what he's thinking and what he's going through. I was the same exact way. He's fun to be around at times but at others you sometimes don't even want to get near him. He's my basketball playing buddy you could say and it's fun to play with him but once you make him mad you better watch out. I guess he's going through a "phase." I'm just hoping he grows out of it soon. I still love him all the same.
Jason is my second son and he's one big trouble maker. He always finds a way to make Michelle or Courtney mad. He takes a thrill in annoying the crap out of them. I guess that's normal, they are siblings. He's fun though, he's like me personality wise. He likes to make jokes or make everyone laugh. He's good to have around when someone's feeling down. He always finds a way to make you smile or laugh, it doesn't matter how sad or upset you are. He's gonna go far in life because of his determination for reaching for his goals. I love him very much and I always will.
Courtney is my little girl. She's full of light and she's always happy. She's always willing to play or help with anything. She's probably the most easy going out of all of the kids. She doesn't make any trouble, she's just a nice, sweet, little girl. She knows how to make you smile just like Jason. She does it in a different way though. She doesn't force you to laugh or make jokes. She just somehow does the cutest things to make you smile or laugh. She always gives you compliments and she's just what I need to keep my self esteem up. She's the one out of all my children that I hang out with the most. That's only because she isn't out hanging with a bunch of friends, she's not old enough to drive places, she's not playing sports and she's not busy tormenting her other brothers and sisters. I know in time she'll change but I'm making the most of it now.
Brian, Jr., and Brianna are my babies. I love playing with them. It's nice to hang around with them because they're luckily the kind of babies that don't cry 24/7 and they're always giggling or smiling. They're happy little babies and I'm thankful for having them as my children.
I smiled at the thought of all of them and then kissed Brian's cheek. He just giggled and threw his arms in the air. I laughed and turned my head to look at Nick as he patted my shoulder.
"You almost ready Frick?" he asked. I nodded my head and then said, "This is going to be hard."
"Tell me about it but at least we're ending with our families by our side and with our fans," he said.
"Yeah, that's true," I smiled. He patted my back again and then said, "Well, I'm gonna go get my mic. I'll see ya in a few."
I nodded as he walked off. The rest of the guys were just walking around talking to a few people before we all went on stage. They have all sure grown. Nick used to be the midget of the group and now look at him...he's taller than me for crying out loud! We have all gone through a lot and I'm just happy we went through all of it together. They're my family, brothers to be more specific and I thank God everyday for giving me the chance to become friends with them and to sing with them. All of them have helped me in some way or another.
Kevin, my cousin, was and still is the older and wiser one of the group. He's serious most of the time and he acts like a manager trying to get everything together perfectly and making sure we're always on time. Don't get me wrong, he's really fun to be around with when he's not so stressed out and he's not in his fatherly mode. If it wasn't for him I wouldn't have been able to meet the rest of the guys or to be in the Backstreet Boys and if that didn't happen I would probably be in a totally different career, with totally different friends, with a totally different family and a totally different wife. That's a lot of totally's but seriously! I have a lot of thanks to say to Kevin.
Howie is one of the coolest and easy going out of all of us. He really isn't into the whole partying scene or acting wild but he's fun to hang around with and get advice from. He's always willing to listen and he's helped me out a lot when I've been in fights with one of the other guys or with Tiffany or if I'm having family troubles. He's the one I turn to the most when I need some really good advice or I need someone serious to listen to me. I'm grateful I had the chance to get to know him.
AJ is probably the craziest person that I have ever met in my entire life. When I was sad or upset he always made me go to clubs with him to get my mind off things. He still does do that! He never changes. Never get in a fight with him though, that's a mistake, believe me! He's tough but he's a softy inside. He's the coolest out of the whole group and if you want to have fun, always go somewhere with him. He has the craziest ideas most of the time. I've gotten in trouble a few times with him but it was worth it because it was fun. He's the guy out of the whole group you go to when you just want to chill and have fun. If he wasn't in the group, I'm positive we all wouldn't be the same. He's brought out a lot of crazy sides to all of us. He's weird but hey AJ is AJ.
Nick has got to be the greatest friend I have ever had in my life. He's like a brother to me and we've been through the most together. Good or bad, we've survived everything. Yes, we did have problems with Tiffany at the beginning but we made it through and we're cooler than ever. He's the most fun to hang out with. He's always doing stupid stuff and making us laugh. He's a natural blonde that's for sure. We all like to pick on him but we can't help it, he is the youngest. I don't know how we clicked so well but I'm guessing it's because our personalities are pretty much the same. We've done some pretty stupid stuff through the years but it was all worth it...even if we did get in trouble which was most of the time. I seriously don't know what I would do without him and without him I would have never met Tiffany and I would have never been able to marry her. I should thank him the most for giving everything to me because Tiffany is my everything. I love him like my very own brother, just like the other guys. No one can ever separate or change our friendship. We'll always be Frick and Frack.
The guys and I are always going to be friends and thanks to God I have gotten the chance to know 4 of the best guys in the world. They've all affected my life and without them I probably wouldn't have been able to get through some of the problems that have happened in my life. I'm very grateful for all of them.
"You nervous?" I heard a sweet voice ask softly. I turned my head and smiled at Tiffany.
"Yeah, I guess you could say that," I said. She smiled and took my hand.
"Don't be, things are going to go fine."
"Yeah," I sighed.
"Don't be so sad, you'll be back," she said. I nodded and said, "I know, I know, but what happens when we come back and we no longer have fans?"
"I doubt that'll ever happen. You might lose some of them but the true fans will always be fans of you guys. Believe me," she said. I nodded my head and kissed her lips lightly.
"Thanks baby," I said. She just smiled at me and took Brian out of my arms.
"Finish up getting ready, you only have a few more minutes," she said.
"All right," I smiled. She then turned and walked over to the rest of the kids and wives.
As she walked away I couldn't help but smile knowing that she actually was my wife and that she actually loves me and gave birth to my children. Tiffany and I have been together for a long time, and through all those years we have been together, we have been through a lot. More than probably any family has ever gone through. We have stayed strong through everything and we will always stay strong at anything that is thrown at us. When we found out Nick loved her, when Nick and I got in those many fights, when Tiffany and Nick were caught numerous times kissing, when Tiffany found out she was pregnant with Michelle and left me...we both stayed strong. When we broke up those several times, when her and Darlene were kidnapped, when I was killed, the years we had to wait before we got married...we stayed strong. When I kissed Melissa and the picture was pasted on every People's magazine in the country, when Melissa lied and said she was pregnant with my child...we stayed strong. When Tiffany fell into a coma, when Christian and Michelle were injured and nearly killed, when Courtney, Brian, and Brianna were kidnapped, and when Tiffany left with the kids when I was working too hard on the songs for the new album...we all stayed strong and never gave up.
It's true, a lot of bad things have happened but a lot of good things have happened too. Like our first date, our first kiss, when Michelle and the rest of the kids were born, when we got married, our honeymoon, when I was given a second chance in life, when we were up at the cabin and had that major food fight that led us to get back together...a lot of great things have happened. Everything that has happened though, are what have shaped our lives and what have made us become who we are today.
Tiffany is everything to me. She's my friend, she's my wife, she's the mother of my children, she's my lover and most of all, she's my soul mate. I love her more than any word can express. What I feel for her is something that could never be broken or be faded away. Love isn't even a strong enough word to express how much I feel for her. She has done so much for me and she has always been there. She's the perfect woman for me and I've never been as happy as I have been when I've been with her. I'm so lucky to have her as my wife and have her love me as much as I love her. She completes who I am and I thank God each and everyday for giving her to me. I'm just so thankful to wake up every morning and look at her beautiful face and know that she's mine...just mine and no other man's. Some people might think that over the years, a couple's love for each other fades. They're wrong about Tiffany and I. What Tiffany and I share is truly true love. With her, I've learned what true love actually is and I've also learned that love truly never fades as time goes by.
"You're on in 1 minute," a stage hand said. I nodded my head and went over to the rest of the guys, the kids, Tiffany and the rest of the wives.
"Ready?" I asked. Everyone nodded and turned on their microphones.
"OK, get going!" another stage hand said. I picked up Brianna and grabbed Tiffany's hand walking out onto the stage. The rest of the guys followed. Screams and flashes went off as we walked to the middle of the stage. I smiled and felt happier than ever to know that we had fans that always never seemed to disappoint and never stop surprising us.
I set Brianna down and she waddled over to Tiffany. I then brought my mic up to my mouth and said, "Hey Orlando, we're back! Ready for one last song?"
Screams rumbled throughout the arena.
"All right! We all picked this song out because it means a lot to us and it touches all of our hearts. We hope it touches yours too," Nick smiled and then looked at me. I smiled back at him and then looked back at the band as the lights dimmed. As the music began to play the video that was supposed to play on the screens above began to play with no sound and a few lights lit up the stage where the guys and I all stood in a row singing together in harmony.
I
will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
I then began to sing.
Remember
the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first saw you smilin' in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one
We all the began to sing together.
I
will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Nick and AJ then began to sing together.
I'm
so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard
We then began to sing together once more.
But
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Howie and Kevin then began to sing together.
I'm
so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light
As we all began to sing the chorus Tiffany and the rest of the wives joined us. I held her hand as we sang, as did all the other guys with their wives. Tears were beginning to sting my eyes and they were about to overflow. I looked over and found Tiffany and Michelle already crying, Nick had a few tears streaming down his face, as did the others. I looked out into the crowd and found them singing right along with us, waving their arms from side to side, tears clearly visible on their cheeks. As we sang, confetti and balloons were released from the ceiling and floated to the audience below. The video was being played as we sang and as I looked at one scene where Nick and I gave each other a big hug before a concert about 5 years ago, the tears that were in my eyes began to overflow.
And
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
As we began to sing the chorus one more time we all looked at each other and gave each other smiles telling us that everything was going to be alright and that this wasn't the end. We were going to be back. We were all crying, I even looked to the side of the stage and found our manager and our dance choreographer crying. Even our band was crying as they played their instruments. I cried happy and sad tears as I sang the last lines to the song. The song that would be the last the Backstreet Boys would sing for quite sometime together up on stage. Singing is my life...and every one of these guys, every single person from the band, every person backstage, and every fan out in that audience is my family. There's no way that I am ever going to forget them...I'm always gonna have them in my heart.
And
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
The music stopped for a moment and we took a deep breath before we ended the song.
Weep not for the memories
Screams broke out and we all huddled into a group hug. The band came down and people from backstage came out and hugged right along with us. We were all crying...there was no stopping the tears. I hugged each of the guys tightly for a few moments and then turned to the crowd. The guys followed and stood next to me patting my back. Nick had his arm slung around my shoulder. Tiffany came up and stood next to me holding my hand tightly.
"Thank you for the memories, the smiles, the laughs, and the tears. We all love you very much and you are the greatest fans a band could ever have. We'll be back but until then we'll always remember you and we hope you'll always remember us. We love you and we'll all miss you very deeply. Take care and God bless each and everyone one of you," I said into the mic as tears still slid down my face.
"Good night and good-bye for now!" we all said together. I then turned to Tiffany and smiled. She wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me tight.
"I love you and I'm very proud of you," she said in my ear. I smiled, sighed happily, and hugged her tighter, "I love you too...always and forever."
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