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Chapter 15
Nick quickly rolled down the window. "I can't talk. I really need to get home. I'll call you later." With that, Nick quickly drove out of the parking lot. I needed to talk to him about that letter he wrote me. I decided I would just go to his house instead of mine. On the way to Nick's house, I stopped off at a 7-Eleven and picked up slurpees for all the Carter kids. I pulled up to his house and tried picking up all the drinks without spilling them. I'm notorious for being clumsy like that. I rang the doorbell with my free hand and was greeted by Leslie. "Hey Les, can I come in?" I asked.
"Yeah, of course. I think we should just give you a key." she said and giggled a little. "Nick is in his room if you just wanna go up there."
"Nah. I've got some goodies for you all first." I said walking into the kitchen and placing the drinks down on the table. I looked up and saw Jane beginning to prepare dinner. "Hi mom." I said getting her attention. She turned around and smiled.
"How are you, Linds? Long time, no see." She said hugging me.
"Yeah, I'm all right. Oh, I brought the kids some slurpees."
"You never come empty handed, do you?" She said sarcastically. Jane gave a yell and at once all the kids, except Nick, were in the kitchen. The kids picked up their drinks and thanked me. I got a few hugs and I was off to Nick's room. I knocked with a slurpee in hand for him.
"Come in." I heard him say quietly. I opened the door and he was laying down on his bed staring at the ceiling. I approached him and sat down on the bed. He looked over and was startled. "Damn, you scared the crap outta me, Linds."
"Sorry...slurpee?" He nodded and accepted the drink. He sat up and began to gulp it. I looked around the room seeing pictures all over. On his dresser, on his mirror, on his night stand. I picked up the large picture of Nick and I that was placed directly next to his bed. I leaned back on the bed and studied the picture. Nick and I were backstage at a concert. He was wearing that rubber batman looking suit while I wore a light blue tube top and matching pants. We were hugging each other tightly and looking into each other's eye. "Good picture." I said putting it back. Nick leaned back next to me. We both looked at eachother as if trying to see what the other was thinking. It worked. I knew what he was thinking.
"Nick, we haven't been on great terms lately, have we?" I asked looking back up at the ceiling.
"I guess not." He answered simply.
"And why is that? Honestly." I asked looking back towards him.
"Well, after I gave you the letter, you've been avoiding me." He said looking into my eyes. Damn, he is laying the guilt on thick! I looked away knowing those eyes could just suck me right in.
"I haven't been avoiding you. I've just been thinking." I took a moment to sigh. "I am so grateful to have someone like you. You are one of the nicest guys I know and I miss what we had before. Not just our relationship, but our friendship too. It's so difficult now 'cuz we know we both have feeling for each other, but I don't know what to do about it." I said sighing again. I looked back at him. He was watching me the entire time.
"Linds, I have been here for you. We met on some freak chance and became friends. I have been here with you through everything. When you were in the hospital, when you were passed out on the beach...twice, when you weren't eating, when you were hurting yourself...I have never wanted to leave you and if I could change things, I would have never let you leave me." My, my, my...that was very touching and you know what? He is absolutely right...for once.
"Nick, I'm still here. I'm sorry I left you, but you couldn't deal with me." I said now sitting up. Come to think of it, why the hell has been with me this long? I am a very difficult person and he could have chosen to leave at any time. I put my head in my hands.
"Then why am I still here? Why am I waiting for you?" He said sitting up. He grabbed my hands. I glanced at our entwined fingers and noticed we both still wore our promise rings. I looked up at him and we just stared into each other's eyes for the hundredth time that afternoon. He let go of my hands and brought brought his hands up to my face. He held my neck in his hands and I knew what was coming. I placed my hands on his bottom jaw and he leaned closer to me. Our lips met in a much needed kiss and we both leaned back on the bed, Nick's chest covering mine. Should we be doing this?
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